Do you have an Eddie Haskell in your office?
By Joan Lloyd
Are you familiar with the Eddie Haskell character from the
“Leave It to Beaver” television show? His
character has become synonymous with a two-faced individual:
all smiles and yeses to authority, but quite the trouble-maker with
his peers.
I’d like your advice on how to deal with my own Eddie
Haskell. One of my administrative staff is insidiously,
subversively affecting the staff with her negativity and bad
attitude, but she is all sunshine and cupcakes to me and my
partners. The staff are reluctant to ask her for help,
because she makes them feel like they can’t handle their own
work – but she will do it and then tell me how happy she was
to help. (Part of her job description is to help with
administrative “overload” tasks, so we are not out of
line asking her to pitch in.)
No one in the office received any salary increases this year,
and when I explained to her at her review, in great detail, why we
couldn’t give raises if we wanted to keep everyone on staff
– she smiled and said she understood perfectly!
Behind my back, she complained (and is still complaining) bitterly
to the others about what a raw deal she got, making threats about
getting a raise and then some next year.
She is extremely judgmental of the other staff – without
ever knowing the whole story – she will give attitude to
staff for coming in late or leaving early, not knowing that they
may have worked until midnight the night before. She will do
exactly what is asked of her, but not one iota more. She has
taken on additional responsibilities over the years – but
only when specifically asked to do so. Again, I get no
attitude from her when I ask her to do things, but she is radiating
indignation to the other staff. And if any of the staff
question her about anything she’s done, she can come up with
an excuse so fast your head will spin.
I have a very small administrative support staff, and
they’ve asked me not to approach her with specific examples
of what she’s saying and doing (I understand from you that is
how best to coach someone) because she would know exactly who
“tattled” on her - and then they’d have to deal
with even more attitude from her. I meet with her monthly,
specifically for the opportunity to express any concerns she has
about work – but I always get a big smile and,
“Everything is great!” I am quite sure she
doesn’t realize that others in the office are telling me what
she says, but I can’t put them on the spot by repeating these
things to her.
I feel like herding cats would be easier than disciplining for
something I only “feel.” She successfully
completes her tasks. She has no attendance problems.
She dresses appropriately. She is nice to clients. But
she is poisoning our well – very stealthily behind my
back. Help!!
Answer:
It’s time to change the script. In most cases, it is
best to use first-hand examples of behaviors. However, in this
case, that appears impossible. And, because her co-workers have
asked you not to give her specific examples, your hands are tied.
So here’s a new episode of the sitcom:
Co-worker: “She is complaining about X,
Y and Z and making me feel stupid every time I ask her to help
me.”
You: “Since you are telling me about
this, I assume you want me to talk with her about her inappropriate
behavior.”
Co-worker: “Oh no! Don’t tell her
I complained about her! Don’t use my example! She’ll
know it was me.”
You: “So what, exactly, do you want me
to do?”
Co-worker: “Just tell her to stop. Or,
just tell her in general…don’t use my
name.”
You: “How can I say anything if I
don’t even see what is going on? I can’t say,
‘Some of your co-workers are complaining about you but I
can’t tell you what they are complaining about. You just have
to be nicer.’ You are tying my hands if I can’t use any
examples. Have you told her how you feel when she treats you this
way?”
Co-worker: “No. I wouldn’t dare.
She’d take it out on me.”
You: “Not if I know about it and
support you. If she retaliates in any way, I will step in. We have
only two choices. You have to tell her when she does something that
offends you. Or, I have to talk with her and tell her I am hearing
many complaints (I wouldn’t name anyone but I would give her
samples of things that I am hearing).” I prefer that you and
others speak with her first, and if that doesn’t get results,
she won’t be surprised when I step in. And when I do, I will
make it very clear that I’ve heard things from many sources
and any retaliation won’t be tolerated.”
Co-worker: “Well if I’m the only
one who says anything, she will blame me.”
You: “I will tell the same thing to
anyone who comes to me with this issue. If the group
isn’t willing to say anything, I will either assume the
situation isn’t bad enough and you’ve chosen to live
with it, or I will counsel her as I described.”
Your team sounds inexperienced in direct communication and
conflict resolution. You will probably have to role play with the
person, so she is ready with specific phrases and approaches. (For
instance, “When she complains you could say, ‘If
you’re so unhappy, you need to go talk to your
manager.’”) After you are finished role playing, say,
“I want you to come back to me the next time she does
something offensive. I want to know how your conversation goes. I
will back you up if you need it.” The key outcome you are
striving for is to teach the team to be responsible for
adult-to-adult communication, instead of tattling to
“mom,” and then hiding behind her skirts.
